Day 13_Guidance vs. Criticism

Start:Sep 24, 2023

Duration:30 Minutes

Goal: this Cognitive Trail will improve the ability to outsmart emotions that result in painful outcomes (Blind Spots).

Description: 'Blind Spots' takes trekkers through specific steps to help outsmart tendencies toward friends and loved ones that are hurtful.


Step 1

Hi again!

We were doing some more thinking. You want to what we realized?

We arrived at the conclusion that some of our biggest lessons that brought us the most happiness occurred because someone thought enough of us to correct us.

Not saying it didn't sting. It did at first. But the small pain was worth it in the end.

How willing are you to open yourself to accept correction when it's offered by someone you know is on your side?

Step 2

Ask a wise and trusted friend or mentor to guide you about the best way to say what's on your mind.

Then ask for him or her to kindly and GENTLY point out behaviors you have shown that are not helpful to you or others. It's okay. No need to wince. This is the most important thing any of us can do to heal and mature.

It’s not criticism. It’s guidance. Big difference.

Guidance is motivated by compassion and good will. Criticism is designed to mock you.

They may seem similar on the surface and both may be painful to hear, but one is done out of love and the other out of hate.

Consider the aftermath. Criticism continues to feel stinging and unkind long after it's finished. It makes you feel 'less than'.

Guidance sometimes has a small sting at first, but later it emboldens you and feels liberating.

Will you reach out and have the discussion?

Step 3

If there's no one to ask, post to Publisher (us) and ask us to help you say the thing that's hard to say.

You could post to your peers in your Camps, too, and see what they have to add.

What's your plan?

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