The Next Step - Blind Spots Checklist

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I've adopted tools to stop hurting myself and others when I'm tempted to lash out or put up with someone else's drama.

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I realize I have tremendous value simply because I am who I am. I live with a sense of freedom and purpose, refusing to allow anyone to steal the joy that comes from appreciating who I am and what I have to offer others.

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I'm confident about who I am and refuse to allow others to have a negative impact on me because of their unkind words or actions. Instead I'm quick to get over it by focusing on my present and future opportunities.

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I understand what's good about me, and I don't need to prove it to anyone. This keeps me from being offended so easily.

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I've learned a lot from watching movies about how people grow. I've watched characters transform, and I apply what I've learned to my own life.

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I face the facts about where I am regarding things I want to change. I ask older, wiser friends to be honest with me about what they see and to hold me accountable to changes I want to make.

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I periodically reflect upon the kind of person I'm becoming. I make changes if I don't like what I see. I'm starting to like what I see more and more.

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I'm honest about how I deal with conflict, and I'm gaining confidence in situations that used to make me feel nervous.

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I know the areas where I struggle and realize that my past shouldn't interfere with my present. I give difficult situations my best effort and apologize when I bungle it. I know the value of these six words: I am sorry. I was wrong.

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I know I can go the distance. I got here, didn't I? I hang in there with challenges until I experience a breakthrough by reconnecting to what's best about me and what gives me confidence. I then bring the best part of me into situations where I've struggled in the past to get the best possible outcome for everyone involved.

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I refuse to allow shame or pride to block me from loving or being loved. When tempted to regress, I stop and silently recall every good thing about myself that I can think of. I pull out the dime in my pocket and read "liberty" on the head of that coin. It's the freedom to love and be loved that I hang onto.

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I recognize toxic signs in a friendship and acknowledge what I do to contribute. I seek to improve my end and talk with a trusted friend about how to be more supportive. I'm willing to distance myself from those who won't engage or aren't interested in changing hurtful behaviors.

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I understand the difference between guidance and simply being critical. I seek out correction from those I trust who can help me make changes that will lead to a better outcome for me and others.

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I reward myself for making difficult changes by spending an hour by myself doing something I enjoy.

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I understand that I'm responsible for my actions. I've forgiven the person who hurt me and have embarked on a future that puts a smile on my face.

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I'm trusting the process, moving on, and leaving the past behind me.

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I know this journey takes time, but I've committed to reclaiming my life and the sense of freedom that comes with that power to let go and redirect my focus to the people now in my life and the opportunities I have in front of me.

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I know the root of my anger or passivity. I'm forgiving at deeper and deeper levels to pull out that root. What helps is that I can see the person I'm meant to be and aim toward that vision.

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I realize the value of apologies. When I'm at fault, I'm quick to say I'm sorry and mean it.

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I've given up on the old way. Instead I've developed courage to listen and respond to others in a way that builds bridges.

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I'm comfortable distancing myself from drama. I take time to myself to think about the conflict and approach it respectfully when both parties have cooled down. But if drama escalates and becomes a pattern, I move on without regret, knowing there's something way better out there for me.